Never Give Up - Thyroid patients London meeting, Feb 9th 2013

So I woke up late, precisely 20 minutes after I was supposed to be on my train on the way to London for our event. And there’s only one train an hour. Yikes.  Fortunately I’d been aiming to be there very early, so I still got there before kick-off, just.

the pretty Kent countryside, seen from my train, 9th Feb 2013

My wonderful fellow volunteers had everything under control when I arrived. I am so lucky to have found such an amazing bunch of people to help run the BTF London Team. I always get a bit worried beforehand because I’m never sure how many other volunteers I’ll have but so far it has always worked out perfectly, we don’t always have the same people on the Team, as some have to reduce their involvement due to health or other commitments from time to time, which is totally fair enough, but other people always seem to come forward and lend a hand. I love the Team. They are all amazing.  I do worry though that the group is such a fragile thing, held together purely by our collective good will.

We had 76 attendees confirmed so there was quite a bit to do, setting out the literature,  putting up signs, registering everyone who arrived, manning the information table, testing the A/V set up, etc. Fortunately the Royal Free catering team were taking care of our refreshments. Doing drinks for so many people at these events would just be too much for us to handle ourselves so we bite the bullet each time and pay for catering on arrival and in the break, counting on donations to cover the cost. 

 

Professor Colin Dayan arrived just after me, as did our other patient speaker. Phewwew. We started more or less on time and the next 3 hours flew by, seeming all to go very well.

I did a talk about my own experiences of psychological symptoms and managing my psychological wellbeing with thyroid disease then our other patient speaker did the same. Our stories were very different but both had similar themes of having been very unwell, struggling with it, feeling out of control and very unnerved/frightened by the whole experience, ultimately finding that a combination of mainstream treatment (which we had both spent a lot of time being suspicious of) and mindful self management have led us back to being able to function and feel pretty well, though in both our cases it has taken quite a while.

Then Colin Dayan gave his talk which was excellent and well received, though it had a lot of graphs and data in it which were sometimes a little challenging to follow. Colin took an unexpected but very interesting approach to the subject. He basically asked us to put ourselves in his shoes and pretend we were doctors, for the duration of his presentation. Then when we had the Q&A session, he said, we could go back to being patients and he hoped a fruitful dialogue could be had, to help work out some of the conundrums around thyroid disease and psychological wellbeing.

He then set about presenting the facts as far as they are known according to current research, including that of his own team in Cardiff. He shared that research in this area is a global effort, with teams around the world looking at different aspects and sharing information over a period of years, slowly building up knowledge and seeking answers that will help thyroid patients.

It seemed that his team have a particular interest in a subgroup of patients which initially I felt I belonged – hard to treat hypothyroid patients.

As far as I understood the data that was being presented, it seemed that there is, potentially, a significant proportion of hypothyroid patients who are being treated with thyroxine yet are more likely to be depressed than either the general population or hypothyroid patients in general.  Some of the questions researchers are asking are:

• Is this coincidental or somehow linked to thyroxine treatment?
• Could combination treatment (with T3 and T4 meds) be better for these patients?
•  Is there a genetic marker that could help identify these patients and get them on optimum treatment sooner rather than later in the future?

The BTF London group were fascinated to learn about this work and so grateful that the scientific community is taking some of our issues seriously and investing time, money and effort in trying to come up with some answers that will ultimately help thyroid patients.  The applause his talk received was heartfelt.

Colin is seeking funding for more research. I don’t know how much he needs, it’s probably lots. As some of you know, in a previous life (oh, it seems so long ago now), I did some significant fundraising for cancer research. Maybe one of these days helping thyroid researchers get the funds they need to do more work in this area might be something I could do. To be honest though it seems like a daunting and not particularly appealing task. I know from my past experience just how expensive serious medical research can be. And fundraising really doesn't float my boat as much as doing other things does. Still, food for thought.

The other thing is, while I recognise the value and importance of work like this and I applaud those who do it, it seems to be just scratching the surface and I know how long it takes for medical research to deliver changes for patients. There are so many issues, beyond how much and what kind of thyroid hormone to give a patient, that affect our psychological wellbeing.

For myself, I know that treatment with Vitamin D and subsequently changing my diet have been highly significant in my recovery. Everyone is different of course, what worked for me is not necessarily going to be helpful for someone else. But so few patients are steered to consider dietary changes or even tested for Vitamin D deficiency by their healthcare professionals. And so few are offered counselling or CBT, or if they’re offered it the potential benefits may not be explained properly and it can come across as if they’re being told their illness is all in their heads which is the last thing we need to hear when we are doing the best we can to take care of ourselves and stay sane. It seems there remains a vast gap in proper medical knowledge around psychological wellbeing, gut health, vitamin D and other potential autoimmune connections.

Equally, perhaps mainly because of stretched resources and cultural issues, the experience that so many patients seem to have of not being listened to and not having their experiences properly acknowledged, never mind effectively addressed, by their doctors,  was reported by attendees yesterday as being a huge factor affecting their psychological wellbeing while ill.

As another thyroid blogger (@hypo_man) put it to me on twitter the other day: 

“being denied treatment has impacted my psychological wellbeing. Self-doubt this has caused is unforgivable”

I know the new NHS Constitution is supposedly working towards a massive culture change in healthcare delivery in this country which sounds great and I believe needs to happen, but I have many misgivings about whether that whole agenda is actually just a smokescreen for government cuts. And anyway, the issue here is not just about the paternalistic and dismissive attitude that some doctors exhibit towards some patients, thereby making their situations worse not better in some cases - it’s actually about knowledge standards and consistency of care for patients who’s lives are being impacted to a ridiculous extent, in some cases over a very prolonged period of time.

It was interesting that Colin’s research measured only depression. Brain fog, which is entirely distinct and seems to be a major concern for almost every thyroid patient I talk to, didn't appear to have been considered at all.  I had very foggy brains for at least a year, but did not score on any measure of depression, because - amazingly - I was never actually depressed. 

So I feel a little sad after yesterday. Although thrilled the event went so well and feedback was so generally positive. And although I’m incredibly grateful for Colin’s work and to him for giving up his Saturday to come and talk to us and for being such a total super star, sharing so generously and answering so many questions so thoroughly and charmingly. He really was a great guy.

It just seems medical science is a long way from being able to make a very meaningful difference for thyroid patients who struggle and we simply have to continue fumbling in the dark, doing the best that we can, trying different things, thinking positively, keeping an open mind and being patient, for the foreseeable future. At least I can happily report that, for now at least, by doing all those things I seem to have recovered a good degree of physical and mental wellbeing. I can think clearly, I have lost weight, I can exercise, I feel good overall.  I celebrate that.

At least the good doctors will acknowledge that they don’t have all the answers and are prepared to work collaboratively with their patients to try and find the best solution or combination of factors that will make the most difference for each of us.

With thanks and good wishes to those good doctors I’m referring to and very special thanks to Professor Colin Dayan for yesterday.  Let’s never give up.